Fostering stories

‘We had a five bedroom house so had no excuse for not having enough room!’ Anne and Peter are foster carers for a brother and sister. Anne worked with children but felt that she wanted to do more with her skills.

‘We enjoy seeing the children develop and grow and knowing that the changes we are seeing in their behaviour, their attainment at school and their personal values are largely down to us and our providing consistent care.’

Conor takes a lot of pride in his appearance, but he doesn’t mind getting his hands dirty when it comes to cars.  Now he’s in Year 11 he’s keen to leave school and get trained up as a mechanic. He’s struggled growing up in an environment where his sexuality wasn’t always accepted.  Coping with bullying and depression has meant he has missed quite a lot of school and is no longer in mainstream education.

Josh is part of a special sports club and enters competitions at a regional level. He’s been in foster care since he was little. When he arrived with his current carers he didn’t speak and had some challenging behaviours. His foster carers have received training to help them create routines and boundaries that give him a sense of security.

Josh’s foster carer says; ‘What stuck most were his eyes. They appeared dull like a candle with an odd flicker. Now over the years his eyes are shining bright and have a beautiful sparkle.’

Mum of three Mary always thought her first year in fostering would mean caring for a baby or child with special needs.

But when she was offered the chance to foster a nine year old boy, she and her family decided age didn’t matter – and say it’s one of the best decisions they ever made.

'Sam fitted in really well right from the start which was good. Everyone in the family adored him and he made new friends very quickly in this new area,' said Mary who took Sam in on a long-term placement. He will now stay with her until he reaches adulthood.

Nichola and Gary Wood, both aged 35, have been fostering for five years. Nichola said: "Our own children were growing but still felt we had more to give, plus my job at the time was a nursery assistant so I knew I loved that role of looking after children. I love watching them progress in confidence and self-esteem, and the feeling of pride when their relationship positively develops, it is such a rewarding role.

This LGBT Adoption and Fostering Week Alec and Kenny tell us why they're #proudtofoster

Alec and Kenny were inspired to become foster carers through Kenny’s work with children with behavioural issues, knowing that many of the children he worked with came from difficult backgrounds and now foster Matthew, a 16 year old with severe learning disabilities.

It’s about rewards and goals. Make the goals a bit higher each time, and persevere. Fostering is challenging but you know what – it’s rewarding as well. Some young people come to you with nothing, they’ve never had anything. They’ve never had any routine before. To see them flourish is fantastic!

Imran  has been in foster care for four years and music is his outlet.  He is very into fashion and likes going to gigs with his mates. Writing music gives him a chance to get his frustrations down on paper and he often writes about his experiences growing up in care. To help him work towards his ambition his foster carer has encouraged him to take part in talent shows at school and he’s also gone on a course to learn DJ skills. His foster carer hopes that one day she’ll be able to see his dream of working on X-Factor become a reality.

Jason Brooks and wife Nikki, recruited in the last fostering campaign in 2010, have fostered ten children since becoming foster parents. The couple, who have two birth children of their own, Declan and Ellie, are short term foster parents for children who come into care and need a short-term solution to domestic or parental issues.

She is an incredibly caring little girl who loves playing ‘mummy’ to animals and younger children. Her carers’ two dogs are her ‘babies’.

Maya is much quieter and more serious than her brother Zak and is doing very well at school. She plays the viola and is even learning to speak Polish! Drawing and crafty activities keep her entertained for hours. Many of her pictures are displayed proudly in her carers’ kitchen. She loves playing outside with her friends and we’ve heard she can ‘swim like a fish.’

“You’re probably too young to remember but it was the plight of the Vietnamese boat people that first got my husband and I interested in helping children,” says Stockport foster carer Glenys. “Because they were repatriated rather than fostered or adopted we couldn’t help them directly.

“But the idea of children that were in desperate need certainly opened our eyes the idea of fostering as a way of making a difference.”

‘I enjoy their company from just having a chat to taking part in activities together.’ Susan is in her late fifties and has been fostering for five years.

‘We were concerned that our religious beliefs would mean we wouldn’t be approved as foster carers, but thankfully this is not the case. Because we have been especially non-judgemental, patient and firm but kind, young people who have some behavioural problems have been able to thrive and be happy in our home. It is a safe calm place away from school which helps those who struggle there.’

Gill and Roger are 44 and 54 years old respectively and have children who are now teenagers. They decided the time was right to share their home with other children who are in need of a safe and happy place.  They really want to do all they can to make a difference to a young person’s life, and have now been fostering for 1.5 years.

Not everything was plain sailing when their foster daughter first came to live with them, it took some time for their whole family to become accustomed to their new situation.  However, the family worked together to adjust to everyone’s needs.

Also teenagers will always remember you and the help you have given them when they become adults. That means a lot.
Letting teenagers into your home helps them to understand what it’s like to be in a loving family. The teenage years can be difficult enough as it is for young people, and those in foster care need to be shown a positive family experience to see how it can help them. As a foster carer myself, I think fostering teenagers is even more rewarding. Teenagers need as much love, care and protection as the little ones do.